Ok, I don't care what y'all have to say but personally I think the the concept of making out with a set of twins is kinda hot. However, since that is explicitly implied incest, and therefore probably illegal, look-alikes are attractive as well. In any sexuality there seems to be an affinity for tall, dark, and gorgeous individuals. I mean, who doesn't like the idea of piercing eyes and a seductively teasing smile staring at you from across the room. Now, what could make that wonderfully sexy mysterious person o so much more intriguing? IF THERE WERE TWO OF THEM! Which leads us to the titillating twin-like twosome consisting of the fauxmosexual songstress Katy Perry, and Actress cum (haha) Singer the lovely Zooey Deschanel. Now for some reason I have an inane obsession with dark hair, pale skin, and blue green eyes. So, needless to say both of these ladies make me swoon like a French woman from 1687. Mmm, both of them are just so perfect, but for the sake of simplicity we'll start with the older of the two, twenty-nine year old Zooey Deschanel.
Zooey's uncommon name comes from the character Zooey Glass, the male protagonist of J. D. Salinger's 1961 novella Franny and Zooey. If it's been biting at you why the name “Deschanel” sounds so familiar, you're probably a rabid Bones fan. Zooey Deschanel happens to be the full sibling sister of one miss Emily Deschanel, better known as the socially inept anthropologist Temperance Brennan on the hit TV show Bones. It would seem like talent runs in the family. Anyhoo, back to miss sexy pants. This Northwestern dropout made her debut in the 1999 comedy Mumford and went on to star, and be typecast, as the “deadpan, sardonic, scene stealing, best friend to the protagonist” a title she herself doesn't really understand as she hardly considers herself “best friend” material. Deschanel played her first lead role in 2003 in the movie All the Real Girls as Noel, a sexually curious eighteen year old virgin who has a life-changing romance with an aimless twenty-two year old. Now, why I was not cast as that twenty-two year old, I shall never know. Deschanel's acting repertoire is actually quite varied, despite being somewhat new in Hollywood, ranging from heavy independent films, to children's movies and TV. And I have yet to mention that the girl also sings and composes. A piano composition of hers, Bittersuite, was featured in the dramedy Winter Passing, in which she starred alongside Will Ferrell and Ed Harris. Deschanel was also slated to play my dead-girl crush, and previous feature, Janis Joplin. But to my great dismay, filming was postponed indefinitely. Currently she is performing with fellow musician M. Ward in the group She & Him, and is in the new summer movie release 500 Days of Summer. Hey, if its got her, I gotta see it.
While I can safely say I've kissed a girl and liked it, that same statement though repeatedly sung, cannot actually be affirmed by its singer, Katy Perry. But who really cares, cause she's really hot. Perry (neé Hudson) was born the child of two Evangelical pastors and grew up not being allowed to listen to “secular” music as a child. After studying Italian opera at the Music Academy of the West, Perry got her GED freshman year so she could begin to focus solely on her music career. Smart, sexy, and driven who wouldn't want a piece of that. At the age of seventeen Katy Hudson took her mother's maiden name and became Katy Perry, as she thought her name sounded too much akin to the actress Kate Hudson. Ironically, her first album which contained songs like “Faith Won't Fail” and “Trust in Me” was deeply and heavily religious. However, this lies in direct contrast with her newest album which has such homolezploitational songs as “Ur So Gay” and “I Kissed a Girl”. One can only wonder what her parents are thinking right now. Apparently, this nouveau vintage queen has plans for more pop albums in the future. And since she's my guilty pleasure, I'll be first in line to download her new stuff.
In a perfect world Zooey Deschanel would be playing a new composition on her piano, and Katy Perry would walk in with her guitar, sit down next to her, and start softly playing along. They would then pause and look deeply into each others iridescent blue-green eyes. Katy would set down her guitar and brush Zooey's hair away, Zooey would pull Katy daringly closer. Lips would touch, AND THEY WOULD MAKEOUT. In short, yes my friends, Katy Perry would kiss a girl and really, really, like it.